Every Game of Thrones Death, Ranked in Order of How Upset They Made Us

 
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Ramsay's was just the latest satisfying death.​

Every Game of Thrones Death, Ranked in Order of How Upset They Made Us

NOT REMOTELY SAD ABOUT IT

Ramsay Bolton

Role: Lord Bolton's bastard son
Cause of death: eaten by his own dogs
Note: Never has anyone in the history of the world deserved to be eaten by his own dogs more. He made Joffrey look like a nice guy

Joffrey Baratheon (above)

Role: Lord of the Seven Kingdoms

Cause of death: poisoned at the Purple Wedding by Olenna Tyrell and Littlefinger.

Note: It really was better that he went.

Viserys Targaryen
 (above)

Role: Exiled head of House Targaryen and brother to Daenerys Targaryen

Cause of death: Khal Drogo poured molten gold on his head at Daenerys' command
 — ouch
Note: Strong contender for worst brother of all time

Gregor Clegane

Role: Knight and head of House Clegane, loyal to House Lannister

Cause of death: Poisoned by the spear of Oberyn Martell in a trial by combat
Note: Technically he's now been brought back to life, but we're not sure how "back to life" he actually is, so he's staying on this list

Alliser Thorne (above)

Role: Brother of the Night's Watch
Cause of death: Hanging ordered by Jon Snow
Note: He tried to kill Jon Snow — even though this turned out to be unsuccessful

Janos Slynt


Role: Former commander of the City Watch in King's Landing, exiled to Night's Watch by Tyrion Lannister

Cause of death: Beheaded for insubordination by Jon Snow

Note: Probably the most high-stakes game of "call my bluff" ever

Pyat Pree


Role: Warlock from Qarth, member of the Thirteen

Cause of death: Burned alive by Daenerys's dragons

Meryn Trant
 (above)

Role: Knight in the Kingsguard

Cause of death: Blinded and stabbed before having his throat slit by Arya Star
Note: He was awful

Craster


Role: A Wildling who lived with his daughter-wives beyond the Wall

Cause of death: Killed by Karl Tanner, a Night's Watchman
Note: Incest, etc.

Kraznys


Role: Slave trader in Slaver's Bay and one of the Good Masters

Cause of death: Burned alive by Drogon after he tried to trade the Unsullied for the dragon and insulted Daenerys

Polliver


Role: Man-at-arms for House Lannister

Cause of death: Stabbed in the throat by Arya Stark

Myranda


Role: Servant of House Bolton and Ramsay Snow's lover

Cause of death: Pushed off a ledge by Theon Grejoy

Stannis Baratheon (above)

Role: Lord of Dragonstone, brother of Robert and Renly Baratheon, claimant to the Iron Throne
Cause of death: Executed by Brienne of Tarth

Note: Ordering your own daughter to be burned at the stake doesn't win you many friends

Selyse Baratheon

Role: Wife of Stannis Baratheon

Cause of death: Hanged herself following death of her daughter
Note: See above

Roose Bolton (above)

Role: Lord of the Dreadfort and head of House Bolton
Cause of death: Stabbed by his own son

MEH. THESE GUYS HAD IT COMING

Lysa Arryn
 (above)

Role: Lady Regent of the Vale, sister to Catelyn Stark, briefly the wife of Littlefinger

Cause of death: Pushed out of the Moon Door by Littlefinger

Karl Tanner


Role: Brother of the Night's Watch, leader of the mutiny at Craster's Keep

Cause of death: Impaled by Jon Snow during raid on Craster's Keep

Rast


Role: Ranger in the Night's Watch

Cause of death: Ripped apart by Jon Snow's direwolf, Ghost, during raid on Craster's Keep

Locke


Role: Master-at-arms for House Bolton

Cause of death: Neck snapped by Bran Stark

Shae
 (above)

Role: Prostitute and girlfriend of Tyrion Lannister

Cause of death: Strangled to death by Tyrion Lannister

Tywin Lannister (above)

Role: Head of House Lannister, Lord of Casterly Rock. Father of Cersei, Jaime and Tyrion Lannister

Cause of death: Shot on the toilet by Tyrion with a crossbow

Mirri Maz Duur

Role: Enslaved godswife

Cause of death: Burned alive on a funeral pyre by Daenerys Targaryen

Doreah
 (above)

Role: Handmaiden to Daenarys

Cause of death: Locked with Xaro Xhoan Daxos inside a Valyrian stone vault by Jorah Mormont at the order of Daenerys

Xaro Xhoan Daxos


Role: Merchant in Qarth

Cause of death: Locked with Doreah inside a Valyrian stone vault by Jorah Mormont at the order of Daenerys

Hizdahr zo Loraq (above)

Role: Scion of the House Loraq, former slave trader, husband of Daenerys

Cause of death: Stabbed to death by the Sons of the Harpy
Note: Had this not happened, he probably would have tried to double-cross Daenerys at some point

Yoren

Role: Recruiter for the Night's Watch

Cause of death: Killed by Ser Amory Lorch, loyal to House Lannister, in a fight

Ros


Role: Prostiture in Littlefinger's brothel and spy for Varys

Cause of death: Shot by Joffrey Baratheon with a crossbow

The Hound


Role: Member of House Clegane, brother of the Mountain, former bodyguard of Joffrey Baratheon, kidnapped Arya Stark

Cause of death: Critically wounded by Brienne of Tarth, left to die by Arya Stark
Note: Though we did find out this season that he was saved by a nomadic tribe

SURE, THEY WERE OK BUT WE DIDN'T REALLY KNOW THEM

Jon Arryn


Role: Hand to the Kind before Ned Stark

Cause of death: Poisoned by Lysa Arryn and Littlefinger

Will

Role: Ranger of the Night's Watch

Cause of death: Beheaded for desertion by Ned Stark

Hoster Tully


Role: Lord of Riverrun, Father of Edmure Tully, Catelyn Stark, and Lysa Arryn

Cause of death: Illness

ACTUALLY A LITTLE BIT SAD ABOUT IT

Irri


Role: Dothraki handmaiden to Daenerys Targaryen

Cause of death: Murdered during Xaro Xhoan Daxos's theft of the dragons at Qarth


Renly Baratheon


Role: Master of Laws, Claimant to the Iron Throne, brother of Robert and Stannis Baratheon

Cause of death: Killed by a shadow with Stannis Baratheon's face that was birthed by Melisandre
Note: For as long as we knew the guy, we liked him

Mag the Mighty
 (above)

Role: Giant fighting in Mance Rayder's army

Cause of death: Killed by Grenn and five other members of the Night's Watch in the Battle of Castle Black
Note: He was an endangered species

Olly

Role: Junior member of the Night's Watch
Cause of death: hanged by Jon Snow after stabbing him
Note: We know he was a traitor, but he was also a very young traitor

Rakharo

Role: Dothraki bodyguard to Daenerys Targaryen

Cause of death: Killed and decapitated by a rival khalasar while scouting the Red Waste

Leaf (above)

Role: Child of the forest (even though she's actually very old)
Cause of death: Sacrificed herself to save Bran and Meera from a band of White Walkers
Note: She invented White Walkers, but she also represented a highly persecuted indigenous group and gave her life for Bran

Grenn

Role: Ranger in the Night's Watch

Cause of death: Killed fighting the giant Mag the Mighty in the Battle of Castle Black
Note: Any friend of Jon Snow's is a friend of ours — see also Pyp, below

Pyp


Role: Brother of the Night's Watch

Cause of death: Shot through neck by Ygritte's arrow in Battle of Castle Black

Mance Rayder
 (above)

Role: Leader of the Free Folk

Cause of death: Shot with a mercy arrow by Jon Snow before he was burned alive

Note: We actually quite liked Mance

Jeor Mormont


Role: Lord Commander of the Night's Watch
Cause of death: Stabbed to death by Night's Watchman Rast during a mutiny

Qhorin


Role: Night's Watch ranger

Cause of death: Killed by Jon Snow (at Qhorin's own behest) in order to trick the Wildlings into thinking Jon has left the Night's Watch

Tansy


Role: Servant of House Bolton
Cause of death: Hunted down by Ramsay Snow and eaten by his dogs
Note: Ramsay Snow = monster

Khal Drogo (above)

Role: Chieftain of the Dothraki people and husband of Daenerys Targaryen

Cause of death: Smothered by Daenerys Targaryen in a mercy killing after a spell by Mirri Maz Duur leaves him in a catatonic state

Osha

Role: Member of the Free Folk who becomes a servant of the Starks and (latterly) a protector of Rickon
Cause of death: stabbed in the neck by Ramsay Bolton

Syrio Forel

Role: Master sword fighter and Arya Stark's instructor in combat

Cause of death: Presumably killed by Ser Meryn in a sword fight (he only had a wooden training sword)

Jory Cassel
 (above)

Role: Captain of the Guards from House Stark

Cause of death: Stabbed by Jaime Lannister through the eye

Rodrik Cassel


Role: Master-at-Arms at Winterfell, Servant of House Stark

Cause of death: Decapitated by Theon Greyjoy
Note: We liked both of those Cassels

Maester Luwin


Role: Maester at Winterfell

Cause of death: Osha ended his suffering after he was stabbed with a spear by an ironborn raider

Talisa Stark (above)

Role: Wife of Robb Stark

Cause of death: Stabbed in stomach while pregnant by Lothar Frey at the Red Wedding

Oberyn Martell


Role: Prince of the House Martell

Cause of death: Skull crushed by the Mountain in a trial by combat
Note: We were really rooting for the guy

Jojen Reed


Role: Warg, brother of Meera Reed, travelling companion of Bran Stark

Cause of death: Mercy killed by Meera after being stabbed multiple times by a wight; burned by a fireball thrown by "The Children"

Maester Aemon
 (above)

Role: Maester at Castle Black

Cause of death: old age
Note: We know he was old and he'd had a really good innings, but we also feel like there was a lot of extra stuff he could have told us ... particularly about the whole Jon Snow and Dany theory

Myrcella Baratheon (above)

Role: Daughter of Cersei and Jaime Lannister, sister to King Tommen Baratheon

Cause of death: Poisoned with a kiss by Ellaria Sand with the help of the Sank Snakes
Note: This felt really unnecessary

Robert Baratheon

Role: Lord of the Seven Kingdoms

Cause of death: Mortally wounded by a wild boar after drinking wine 
given to him by Lancel Lannister at Cersei Lannister's command
Mainly because him dying left the Lannisters in power

Barristan Selmy


Fourth member of the Kingsguard, advisor of Daenerys

Cause of death: Killed fighting the Sons of the Harpy in Meereen
Note: A real old-school hero

REALLY SAD ABOUT IT

Shireen Baratheon
 (above)

Role: Daughter of Stannis and Selyse Baratheon
Cause of death: Burned alive as a sacrifice to the Lord of Light by Melisandre at the order of Stannis Baratheon

Note: Killed by her own horrible father. Patchface's only friend ... pass the tissues please

Ygritte
 (above)

Role: Soldier in Mance Rayder's army and Jon Snow's lover

Cause of death: Shot with an arrow by Olly in the Battle of Castle Black
Note: "You know nothing, Jon Snow"

Rickon Stark

Role: Youngest son of Ned Stark
Cause of death: Shot with an arrow by Ramsay Bolton
Note: Rickon didn't get as much air time as the other Starks, but we like all Starks by default and he was just way too young to die

EMBARRASSING LEVELS OF DEVASTATION


Hodor (above)

Role: Loyal servant of House Stark
Cause of death: Holding the door for Bran and Meera *sobs for three hours*
Note:We can't really talk about this yet, it's too soon

Eddard Stark
 (above)

Role: Hand of the King and Lord of the North

Cause of death: Beheaded by Ser Ilyn Payne at the order of Joffrey Baratheon

Note: The first big shock death of the series; we're still not quite over it

Robb Stark
 (above)

Role: King of the North, son of Lord Eddard Stark and Lady Catelyn of Winterfell

Cause of death: Shot by Frey crossbowman and then stabbed through the heart by Roose Bolton at the Red Wedding


Catelyn Stark
 (above)

Role:Wife of Eddard Stark, Mother of Robb, Sansa, Arya, Bran and Rickon

Cause of death: Throat slit by Black Walder Rivers at the Red Wedding


Jon Snow
 (above)

Role: Commander of the Night's Watch, bastard son of Eddard Stark
Cause of death: Stabbed by Night's Watch mutineers

Note: We know, we know. But technically this was a still a "death"

(Editor's note: Game of Thrones superfans: this list is based on the series rather than the original books. We appreciate there are some discrepancies).

Extracted from: www.cosmopolitan.com

Fuente: www.cosmopolitan.com
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